Sunday 28th December 2025
As we come to the end of 2025, I’ve found myself reflecting in a way that feels quiet, steady, and a little more grounded than years gone by. Mostly Kate has always been a space for honesty and nuance. A place where things don’t need to be wrapped up neatly or explained away. DPDR remains a big part of my story, but this year reminded me that life doesn’t pause while you’re trying to understand your mind. I’ve still been living, learning, messing up, growing, and slowly finding my feet.
The start of 2025 came with a big breakup, and not an easy one to sit with. Alongside the sadness and loss and hurt, I had to face my own role in how things ended. Accountability is uncomfortable, but it’s also freeing. There’s something grounding about being able to say, I wasn’t perfect here, and that’s okay. Growth doesn’t come from avoiding the truth; it comes from meeting it honestly. We made so many wonderful memories over the 4 years we were together, and I learnt a lot from it too. I will always be thankful for the person I entered adulthood with, and I’m grateful for the journey we shared.
Naturally, one of the biggest shifts this year was doing more things on my own. I have actually loved it, it just scared me at first. Choosing yourself without a safety net can feel daunting, but it taught me how much I enjoy my own company. Who knew! Being alone didn’t make me lonely; it made me more connected to myself. Independence stopped feeling like something to prove and started feeling like something to trust. That confidence followed me into travelling more. Solo travel became a quiet reminder that I’m capable of navigating unfamiliar places, making decisions, and sitting with uncertainty. I wasn’t fearless, just willing, and that felt like enough.
I also started the gym this year, not as punishment or pressure, but as care. Now, movement feels respectful rather than critical. I show up consistently, have learnt what strength looks like when it’s rooted in kindness and in treating my body like something worth looking after, not fixing.
Boundaries became another big lesson. I’ve learnt that if I don’t want to do something, I can say no, something that used to feel impossible. But I’ve also learnt to recognise when fear is the only thing holding me back. In those moments, I now try to say yes and do the thing anyway! The difference is intention. I’m no longer people-pleasing; I’m choosing based on what feels aligned and best for me.
Starting Mostly Kate has been one of the most freeing parts of this year. It hasn’t reached masses of people, and that’s okay. Knowing it’s helped even a few is more than enough. This space has always been an outlet for me, a place to put thoughts when my mind feels full. I love writing here, and I love the conversations it’s opened up, even the quiet ones.
DPDR has continued to shape my self-awareness in ways I’m still understanding. When you don’t always feel present in your body or the world around you, your mind becomes the one constant. Mine is always there; busy, loud, filled with chatter, music, conversations, images. I can always rely on my brain to show up. Sometimes that’s comforting, sometimes it feels like a whole civil war of thoughts going on up there! But it’s taught me to listen closely, notice patterns, and reflect deeply. I might be a little too self-aware for my own good at times, but I’d rather that than disconnected from my own mind and body.
Dating this year was, if I’m honest, a bit of a shitshow! Modern dating is tricky and confusing and has a way of highlighting attachment styles, insecurities, and emotional wounds you thought were long healed. I’ve learnt that I’m an overthinker with an anxious attachment style – not easy, but important to recognise. Awareness feels like the first step towards creating a calmer, more secure life for myself, with or without having someone to share it with.
Friendships this year have been both nourishing and challenging. I recently had to let go of a friendship that meant a lot to me after realising I was no longer a priority and was being treated poorly and that hurt. But it was an opportunity to recognise my worth, my needs and not settle for less than I deserve. Plus I have made some other wonderful connections this year. I’ve met a few lovely new friends who I’m really enjoying getting to know, which feels like a reminder that connection doesn’t disappear when one door closes; it just changes.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt this year is that putting yourself first doesn’t make you selfish. You can be your own top priority while still being kind and considerate. Not everyone is capable of that, and that’s okay. It’s not my job to carry that for them. I’ve also learnt how much energy I waste trying to control outcomes or force things into working. There is so much more peace in trusting that what’s meant for me won’t pass me by. Letting go isn’t giving up, it’s choosing softness where anxiety used to live.
Progress hasn’t been linear. Some days it feels like I’m standing still. But I’ve realised that this often happens because I’m constantly raising the bar as I grow. The version of success I’m measuring myself against keeps evolving, and that’s not failure, that’s growth.
I love the person I am today. I have flaws. I overthink. I live in my head more than I’d like. But I’m kind, hard working, self-aware, reflective, and learning how to care for myself better each day.
Looking ahead to 2026, my goals feel gentler. I want to let go of the pressure to date or find the perfect relationship. I want to be fully content on my own, rather than always searching for something more. I want to see more of the world where I can, stay consistent with moving my body, continue raising the bar while being kind to myself along the way.
Mostly, I want to keep making space for peace and growth.
Enjoy the new year celebrations, see you all in 2026!
All my love, Kate x
Mostly Kate 