“Floating Away From Myself: Understanding Dissociation with EUPD”

Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD), also known as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), is one of the most complex and misunderstood mental health conditions. 

It affects how a person thinks and feels about themselves and others, often making it difficult to manage emotions, behaviour and relationships.

Some of the core features include:

• Intense emotional swings that can last from a few hours to a few days
• A deep fear of abandonment, which might lead to frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined rejection
• Unstable relationships, often swinging between idolising and devaluing others
• A fragile sense of self, where identity can shift rapidly
• Impulsive behaviours, such as unsafe sex, binge eating or reckless spending
• Periods of emptiness, anger or paranoia, especially under stress

There’s one symptom that flies under the radar though and that’s dissociation.

Dissociation can feel like losing your grip on reality. One minute you’re present and the next you’re watching your life like it’s a movie – distant, foggy and not quite real.

I remember sitting in a crowded café, my heart racing from a stressful morning. Suddenly, the world started to blur. The voices around me echoed like I was underwater. My hands looked like they belonged to someone else. I couldn’t feel them. I wasn’t “in” my body anymore. I wasn’t sure where I had gone.

In this blog post, I want to unpack what dissociation really is, how it shows up in EUPD and what can help — because if you’ve ever felt this way, I want you to know that you’re not alone.

Section 1: What Is Dissociation?

At its core, dissociation means feeling disconnected — from your body, your thoughts, your memories or even the world around you.

There are a few common types:

Depersonalisation – feeling like you’re not real, like you’re watching yourself from outside your body.

Derealisation – the world feels dreamlike or fake, like a film set or a foggy day.

Unlike daydreaming or zoning out, dissociation often happens because something feels too overwhelming and your brain is trying to protect you.

Section 2: How Dissociation Shows Up in EUPD

For many people with EUPD, dissociation can be triggered by emotional overload. When feelings become too intense, the brain might “shut down” as a survival response.

You might have heard of fight, flight, or freeze — but for some of us, it’s more like fragments.

Examples include:

• Going completely non-verbal in an argument, even though you want to speak.
• Watching yourself from above, like a character in a film.
• “Losing time” and suddenly realising an hour has passed and you don’t remember what happened.

Trauma plays a big role in this behaviour. Dissociation can be the brain’s way of keeping you safe when something reminds it of past pain.

Section 3: What Dissociation Feels Like (Lived Experience)

Dissociation can feel like:

• Being underwater, with the world sounding muffled and far away
• Looking at life through a foggy window
• A sense that you’re floating above your own body
• Feeling like your limbs don’t belong to you
• It’s not just weird — it can be terrifying. 

There’s often confusion, shame and a sense of isolation. You might think:

• “What’s wrong with me?”
• “Am I going crazy?”
• “Why can’t I control this?”

Physically, dissociation might come with dizziness, numbness, blurry vision, or a “floaty” sensation. It’s important to know this isn’t the same as psychosis or epilepsy, though they can sometimes be confused.

Section 4: How Dissociation Affects Daily Life

Living with dissociation can be exhausting. It impacts daily life in many ways:

• At work or uni, you might zone out in meetings or lectures and miss key details.
• In relationships, it’s hard to explain that you’re “there, but not really present.”
• Memory and concentration often take a hit — making you doubt yourself or feel like a burden.
• When disconnected from your body, self-harm or risky behaviour can feel less “real” in the moment.
• Others might misunderstand your symptoms — seeing you as rude, distracted, or cold.

It can feel like life is happening to you, not with you.

Section 5: Coping With and Managing Dissociation

The good news? You can manage dissociation. It takes time and support, but you’re not powerless.

Grounding techniques help bring you back to the present:

• The 5-4-3-2-1 technique: Name 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, 1 you can taste.
• Sour sweets, ice cubes, or textured objects to snap your senses back to life.
• Deep breathing and body scans to gently reconnect with your body.

Other tools include:

• Creating a daily routine to build structure and safety.
• Dissociation logs or journal prompts to track triggers and patterns.
• Apps like Finch for grounding reminders.

Therapies such as DBT (Dialectical Behaviour Therapy) or EMDR can be really helpful — especially with a trauma-informed therapist.

And perhaps most importantly: build a support system that gets it. Even just one person who understands can make a huge difference.

Section 6: Dissociation, EUPD and Stigma

Sadly, there’s a lot of misunderstanding about dissociation — especially in the context of EUPD.

Some myths we need to bust:

• “You’re just seeking attention.”
• “You’re faking it.”
• “You’re just distracted.”

Media often portrays EUPD in extreme or harmful ways, ignoring the quiet struggle of dissociation. We need more honest conversations, better training in mental health services and compassion-led understanding. Dissociation isn’t a character flaw. It’s a survival mechanism.

Conclusion

If you dissociate, please know this: you’re not broken. Your brain is doing its best to protect you — even if it doesn’t always feel helpful.

Healing is possible. With support, understanding and the right tools, things can get better. If this post resonates with you, feel free to share your own experience or ask questions. You never know who you might help by speaking up.

You’re not alone and you’re not “too much.”

You’re surviving and that’s incredibly brave!

Finola