Friday 26th September 2025
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing. It’s a type of therapy that was first developed in the late 1980s by a psychologist called Francine Shapiro. She originally designed it to help people process traumatic memories, and since then it’s become widely used for PTSD, anxiety, phobias, and even things like depersonalisation and derealisation.
So, what’s the idea behind it? Well, when something really stressful or traumatic happens, our brains don’t always file the memory away properly. Instead, it can get kind of “stuck.” Imagine a file on your computer desktop that never makes it into the right folder. It just sits there, always in sight, always pinging for attention. That’s what unprocessed trauma can feel like. It doesn’t fade in the background like normal memories do, and it can keep causing distress years down the line.
This is where EMDR comes in. In a session, a therapist will help you revisit these memories in a safe way while using something called bilateral stimulation. That might look like following their finger back and forth with your eyes, listening to alternating sounds in each ear, or even gentle tapping. Somehow (and scientists are still studying exactly why), doing this while recalling the memory helps your brain unstick the “file,” process it properly, and finally store it away.
The aim isn’t to make you forget what happened, but to take the sting out of the memory. Instead of it feeling raw and overwhelming, it becomes something you can think about without your body going into full fight or flight mode.
Who might benefit from EMDR?
- People living with PTSD or past trauma
- Anyone who struggles with anxiety, panic attacks, or phobias
- Those who feel weighed down by painful memories that still feel “alive”
- Even people working through grief, low self-esteem, or depression
At first, EMDR can feel a little odd, after all, following someone’s fingers while thinking about tough memories isn’t exactly your average therapy session. But a lot of people find it gentler than they expected. You don’t have to retell every detail of your trauma for it to work. Your brain already holds all the information; EMDR is just about helping it process things in a healthier way.
My experience
Back in June 2023, my therapist suggested EMDR for me. I was hoping it might help me process some of the memories that kept me feeling unsafe, and maybe ease the “spaced-out” DPDR feeling I’d been living with.
I gave it a go with weekly sessions for a couple of months with a trained EMDR therapist. To be honest, I wasn’t totally sold from the start. I didn’t feel a great connection with my therapist, and because the sessions were virtual, I found it harder to stay fully engaged. Plus, EMDR isn’t exactly cheap, so I often found myself wondering if it was worth the money.
That said, even in that short time, I noticed a shift. A few of the memories that used to hit me really hard felt lighter, almost like their grip had loosened. It wasn’t life-changing (yet), but it showed me that EMDR has real potential.
I’d like to give it another try in the future, ideally with a therapist I click with more. My hope is that once those memories are fully reprocessed and filed away, I’ll feel less on edge, and the wall of DPDR will start to soften. More presence, more calm, more space for connection. That’s the goal.
EMDR isn’t magic, and it’s not always an instant fix, but it can be a powerful tool for healing. It gives your brain the nudge it needs to finally sort through old experiences and let them rest where they belong, in the past. For me, even the small changes were worth noticing. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting or erasing the past; it means loosening its grip so you can move forward with a little more freedom and peace.
All my love, Kate x
Mostly Kate 